The Most Important Parenting Strategy from a Non-Dual Perspective
Don’t lie to your kids. You can think about that just from your own experience of being raised in the society that we’re in, and now trying to grapple with the craziness of your mind. That’s what we’re doing in non-duality studies, right? We’re grappling with the craziness of the way we interpret our perceptions. We’re trying to get over the fact that we have been lied to and lied to and lied to our whole lives. Really, the most important parenting strategy is to work on yourself. We have come to this place in society where we are constantly analyzing each other to the point of, you know, total craziness. We analyze our own children constantly. Leave them alone. Work on yourself. Provide a solid, steady, honest environment for them to live in, and then just make sure that you’re working on yourself in an honest and effective way.
Don’t grasp after every crazy spiritual fad that comes along. A good, honest human being will raise honest, good children. We have a very complex world to live in, and all children need to learn how to live within this complex society that we’re in. They also need to learn how to be the best human being possible to do that. Firm guidelines and rules, of course, are good, but don’t lie to them. And it’s hard to do if you try to raise children without lying to them. What are you going to do about the Tooth Fairy? What are you going to do about Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, right? How many other lies are so baked into our society and our consciousness? How much do you constantly lie to them rather than respect their ability to understand what’s going on in your life or in your neighborhood or, you know, whatever?
Now, I’m not talking about constantly slamming them with the hard truth—you know, they’re children—but really pay attention to whether or not you’re lying to them. One of the main ways we lie to children is by baby-talking to them constantly rather than just talking to them like they’re human beings. You’re talking to them like they’re an object, and they’re not an object; they’re a person.
The only way you can do this right is if you’re not radically lying to yourself all the time. This is where non-duality studies come in because you’re constantly looking for things that are creating division inside your consciousness, in your mind. Always, it’s a lie of some kind. It’s a misconception of some kind. We live in a world of nature. Everything operates within this natural Mother Earth, and this is what we’re doing when we’re raising children. We are raising them in the Earth, so there’s no need for these fundamental lies of how to live and who we are.